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"I've been covering mirrors lately. I've been feeling wrong in clothing that used to make me feel beautiful lately. I've been crying a lot lately."
Dove Cameron has opened up about her struggles with depression and dysphoria in a powerful new post about her identity.
Last night (May 19), Dove Cameron took to Instagram to speak candidly with her fans about her identity. Dove posted a set of selfies of her crying with the caption: "Identity vs the self !!! Depression & dysphoria. For me, identity and the self have always been diametrically opposed, and there has only ever been room for one at a time to occupy my life."
She continued: "I have never been able to make them hold hands, and i realize as i get older, it's because I hold a deep-seeded belief that who I am is wrong, I am not allowed to be just as I am, I am not meant to be here. I feel I must be something else if I am going to be allowed to be here. And I really do wanna be here with you."
READ MORE: Dove Cameron reveals why she deleted all her old music after Boyfriend went viral
Dove explained: "More days than not, I feel pulled towards no identity at all, I feel most natural as something imperceivable to myself, an energy and a presence. I don’t know if I will ever be able to live as this, if I will ever find a rhythm in this job where perception is one of the major cornerstones. All that I am truly clear on is that I'm interested in a life unburdened by myself."
She added: "I am beginning to have a hope that the public platform that has been difficult for me to learn to take up space as myself in, can actually be the conduit for change/mutual support/exploration/safety. There is room for us to talk about the things that terrify us/can’t be commoditized on a large scale, that can’t be commercialized and easily sound-bitten."
Dove ended by writing: "Maybe the spaces that are the least human can become the most human, if we want that, and we can all let each other take up a little more space. I love you."
In the same post, Dove also shared a series of notes in which she opens up further about her journey. Dove says: "I've been covering mirrors lately. I've been feeling wrong in clothing that used to make me feel beautiful lately. I've been crying a lot lately, sometimes terrorized by my identity and image, sometimes in absolute flow with something new and joyous."
She continued: "Sexuality and performative gender norms, societal rewards and identity are really throwing me through a loop. Social media and mirrors and branding and the consent broadcasting of visibility of ourselves and everyone everywhere is not optimal for mental health, clarity of energy or relationship to our inner world."
Dove clarified: "What I am choosing to say is I am in a process, I'm investigating, I'm struggling more than half of the time and I'm trying to maintain a quiet non-judgemental curiosity rather than punish myself for not knowing what I'm feeling or where I'm going."
Dove Cameron publicly came out as bisexual in 2020 but has since stated that queer is a more accurate way of describing her sexuality.
Speaking further, Dove said: "I share this without conclusion because I don't have answers from myself yet. I never want you to feel alone in what seems like a sea of humans who are comfortable with their identity, like they may not even have to think twice about it (which is wonderful and we are happy for them)."
She added: "We all deserve a life unburdened by the societally created identity, we all deserve to unlearn self abuse and self hatred. I am on that journey now, and I'm sharing that so that we may all feel comfortable in a conversation that may be confusing, and we may navigate something that feels difficult to put to words, together."
Dove ended by stating: "Emotion is COOL. dysphoria is OK. living as a human is intense. we are all holding hands. don't forget."
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